Today I went with my grandparent’s agian to work on the rent house. The end is in sight. We did the carpet, the roof, the bar and just touched up alot of other things. Lately my conscience has really been killing me. I did something that I knew was wrong and now I’m paying for it. I hate sin! I hate this flesh that is so attracted to sin!
My heart is broken.
My lips are sealed.
I have not one word to say.
My pain. Oh the sting!
Of sin of disobedience to God.
My hatred. The hated act.
I’ve been charged, tried and found guilty.
Oh, that I had a heart that would humbly obey God.
Yet, I see this wicked thing that braves the wrath of the almighty.
I’m cold, listless, lifeless….hard.
I want change. But from where will it come?
Why must I go on feeling impenitent?
Why must I continue to stride in rebellion?
The nature of man. Oh, how fallen!
Dark. Subdued. Slavish. Fear.
Why should I continue forever like this?
Forever is to much, to long.
Why must I continue to act as an enemy of God?
I don’t want to break His heart any longer.
Help!! I can’t do it Lord!!
Please break me of my love for this world.
Cleanse me pure from selfishness.
Give me a heart that’s benevolent.
Jesus, you said you came to save and not to condemn.
Help me not to love darkness but to come into the light.
Take away the darkness Lord!!
Lord, I implore Your mercy and grace. Help me to put off this corrupt flesh and put on Christ. Your word says, ” a righteous man may fall seven times and rise again but a wicked man shall fall by calamity.” So i choose to rise again Lord. It is my heart to seek You. I ask You to lose me of the grip of this world. I plead the Blood of Jesus and all that it stands for over my life. I submit my will to Yours. Thank You Lord that you are not willing to leave me the same. In Jesus’ name. Amen.